Rachael McCallum's Unicorn Spew,

Rachael McCallum's UnicornSpew ~The online journal of Artness as-it-happens.


Sunday 27 July 2014

most destructive power

What's the most destructive power in the universe?

Free will.

I got the phrase above from thought provoking conversations with my dad, and the image from the glorious internet. the two collided for me...

Saturday 26 July 2014

Cast Days







Something changes when you have to sit inside for too long.

A Perception of what is good and bad.
My understanding of happy or sad.

I am utterly comfortable, with my sprained ankle.
I don't have any need to move - and yet I am so much more in misery than I am
 when I have problems to solve, places to be, people to pay and things to say!

(you can tell I have thought about this far too long, it has become a poem)

I'm bursting with opinions. with dreams. With wants.
As If I am forever condemmned to sitting still.
but I am.
It is forever
And I am still.
I hope for a more dramatic injury, or a far less painful one, anything to give me change to play with.

Simply reading or watching is not enough. I can't just absorb it, I want to challenge it, converse with it, react to it.
But I am still.

Friday 25 July 2014

There is something about this collection of objects, shapes and patterns that still fascinates me.

Its so casual.

SO bright

its drawing through space and itself.

A line is recognized as an object,

shading is recognizably actual shadow.

No illusion, very naked

Why do I like the Exposed naked quality ? - not sure, will have to work on my fixation with honesty

Not illustrating an image of anything, yet it is something - objects. No illusion, not abstract, but irrelevant and absurd connections.

Absurd - Careless - random? not random, it was choreographed...

I'm not looking to make a direct meaning, just bring together fragments of life as I find them in my favour. I pick things. Collect things. Combine. They are flowing towards me and past me in time. I arrange and hold them for a moment for a photo and now it is made as one in a photograph.

Photographs can do that - make something look whole within the space, when in real life it may not appear resolved....

thoughts of the day  -  I wonder if that refining/ framing quality of photography is what makes me fond of this piece / nostalgia?

You miss the shadow potential when there is not objects. That is a loss of depth, I think the photo is a souvenir of the real, that is all it can be.

 

And so, for sanity's sake, I keep my studio in my mind.

I have sprained my ankle and have been left staring into my past few months, questioning if it has all been worth it.

There is a life I have coveted. I have seen 'It' ever since I walked into a mall. It's not the rich life, but the one where you are playing the useful part in the shiny happy people's lives by working in retail. I have recently embedded myself into this world.

I have learnt, "its a full-on Monet" (Tai: What's a monet?
Cher: It's like a painting, see? From far away, it's OK, but up close, it's a big old mess. 1996, Clueless)


Don't get me wrong, its not a life long dream. But it was an expectation of where I would be at my age. Fairly realistic, but aiming a little low on the Dream Machine Scale.

I'm there, I'm working. I turn up playing the part. Time passes and the doors close. Again I realize It was a performance and we all go home. It is completely what you make it. You can have a great attitude and have a good time or you can find the cynical route where you notice the barcode on your name. It's interesting because everything and nothing is valuable. Once the day is over, no-one could care less. You are free to ponder your personal life, and these two personalities dont have to interact at all.

"Relationship George cannot collide with Friendship George". (Seinfeld, yes I have a tv)

But now that I'm there, and I'm one of the happy, shiny people, I am coveting something else.... My artist life! The shoes I always wanted to end up in are desperately calling me.

The advantages of a regularized income in retail is that you can budget your expenditure to suit. An artist's income - for me- has so far proven to be a lucky feat to break even. If money did run my world, retail would remain a constant. But satisfaction, progression, innovation and investigation remain my real motivators. To satisfy my curiosity is to steady the stone of Sisyphus - you cannot!

And so when the temptation to quit my job an run free in the meadows washes over me, my personal rewards are still possible.

But lo, Harsh Reality comes flapping down to deliver the slap of practicality. An artist needs materials, in my particular case - I need to install my kiln. For my awkward house - I'm saving $1000 at least to install. And so I bounce back and perform as a shiny people again!

There is nothing wrong with retail, if you can be happy in sales, you can be happy in any customer service role. My only bite is that although I am happy during the day with my double shot cappuccino - I know in my heart that I can be happy with my double shot cappuccino just about anywhere, and happy in my studio without food, wi-fi or my double shot cappuccino.



And so, for sanity's sake, I keep my studio in my mind.